In my dating days, I had more than my share of goofy events, hopeful suitors, and odd match-ups. I thought I knew what I wanted but as one of my friends kidded me, I should have been more specific. Maybe that’s why ‘the list’ was born.

Made up of all the must have’s as well as plenty of “don’t touch that’s”, the list seemed so reasonable — on paper. Basically it was about making good choices; knowing opposites may attract but oil and water still separate. That the more you know, the less you’ll be disappointed by the man behind the curtain. And hey, what doesn’t work better with guidelines? I learned a lot in those few years. I realized what I could tolerate, where my values lay, my own weak points, what drove me crazy, what I craved, needed and could do without. I also knew what inspired me, what I admired and respected.  I just had to pay attention.

That’s about the time in the play where the right guy enters the stage – and he did. He was a leading man who not only made the cut, he ‘matched the furniture’, which was my euphemistic way of saying that he fit my life like a glove. We were the same age, each had 3 three kids, were in the same business, loved music, the arts, had the same values and kicked each other’s butt with humor. Most of all, he innately knew the way to a woman’s heart — her kids. They knew he was ‘the guy’ — before I did.  Really,  who hands you a spread of white roses decorated with a set of dinosaur books for her grandson? I realized, finally, I’d be nuts not to give an A+ — and my heart to that kooky former journalist and HS baseball coach who knew how to hit all the bases.

I didn’t get the lifetime but for the time we had, I had the wonderful guy who topped ‘the list’ — and then some.